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Mon, 11 Apr 2016 7:20 am BST- Light Rain
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Posted By Discussion Topic: Malanka 1953 - present

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fidear45
Mar-20-2014 @ 10:07 PM                           Permalink
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Nope BD is prop less. Something big white and very bling. That goes round and round.

Life is too short

M&F

Forum Girly Swot 11.02.2011

Maffman100
Mar-20-2014 @ 10:26 PM                           Permalink
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What, like a roundabout?.........

Matt

Thunder syndicate-
http://flic.kr/g/fMF1K

garryn
Mar-20-2014 @ 10:37 PM                           Permalink
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Sounds like Carousel

Garry

Maurice_Mynah
Mar-20-2014 @ 11:13 PM                           Permalink
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Garryn said...
As long as your not all living on Minimal

I wouldn't do that if they paid me... but that would be minimal wages.

Sorry... I'll go away now!

I think therefore I am.  René Descartes.
I sink therefore I was.  Maurice Mynah.

fidear45
Apr-24-2014 @ 6:39 PM                           Permalink
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Hi everyone its that time again. One week afloat and bullied into the tale already.

Five go mad on Moon Discovery
Saturday 5th April
Stalham to Wroxham Hotel – Fried chicken/Chinese for tea
Today started out differently to any other holiday we have had on the broads in that we were not at home, not in an hotel and there were only four Malankans including Boris the magnificent. The fifth member of the “five go mad crew” was Charlie whom we sometimes call Rose but always call our friend. The remaining Malankans were back in Belgium revising frantically for the IB and pre IB exams later in the year. (May / June)
What was even more unusual was that we were at Charlie’s house (Gaff or residence depending on accent), we were also sporting absolutely spiffing hangovers as we had indulged rather profoundly in some fermented grape juice after arriving and having a lovely “chippy” meal of fish and chips twice, pie and chips twice, and a portion of chips for the dog please, as we had forgotten his doggie food and the poor wretch was starving by half past eight.
All that aside we dragged ourselves out of our pits and gathered all that we would need for a week on an Hire Boat. Yes folks the Malankans were spending their Easter break on Moon Discovery, courtesy of the kind folks at Moonfleet. Charlie had organised a Tesco home delivery so we didn’t have to rush to the supermarket, Phil had arranged for us to take over the boat whenever we wanted on Saturday as she was not out immediately before we took her over. So we packed the car, locked up Charlie’s mansion and set forth to Stalham. The biggest difference was that the journey having been broken in Essex would now only be 90 minutes or so.
In preparation for the Saturday pick up Fiona had booked a mooring at the Wroxham Hotel for Saturday evening so we could take our time and “discover our” new charge for the week on the journey down the Ant.
Upon arrival in Stalham the crew set too with the task of transferring our bits and pieces to Moon Discovery (MD from now on). Having completed the transfer of food, bags, coats, hats, gloves, and so on, we wandered over to the shed to see how our old lady was looking. She still looked mightily miserable with her external starboard chine missing and some preliminary undercoat applied to the hull. The internal starboard chine was in pieces outside the back of the shed and it had a fairly close resemblance to Balsa. That fairly important structural element had been replaced with a brand new oak piece the cost of which I don’t yet know. Considering the amount of work she was having done the old girl didn’t look too bad and it was with a sad parting glance that we sought out Rob to give us the low down on MDs features and quirky bits.
Charlie and I had walked into Stalham with Boris to purchase some Chilli Jam pork pies only to discover the butcher didn’t have them anymore. After a few minutes of stunned silence and profound mourning, we decided that pork pies weren’t the be all and end all of everything and cracked on with getting back to the boatyard.  
Rob duly arrived and showed us how to lower canopy (electric), use the reversing camera (very cool that one), activate both bow and stern thrusters (very cool even if they are cheating), turn on gas, isolate gas, change cylinders, and not forgetting the automatic mud weight windlass. He also offered some advice about loo flushing as the system does tend to fill up if you use the pre fill option. Personally I have my own pre fill option and planned to use it throughout the week.  
Soon we were ready for the off and so we cast away the lines and pushed gently away from the quay heading taking full advantage of the bow and stern thrusters. To be very honest it was very cool to just slip sideways out into the river and I did in fact crack a smile. The canopy was down the sun was shining, the forecast was good and we were finally floating…. Bliss.
MD is a carousel class boat and is very well appointed inside with some very good features which I will write up separately. It took a few minutes to get comfortable on the Captain’s chair which both slides and rotates and so is a great perch in the evening for those with either very short legs (Charlie) or rather longer ones as well (anyone else).  
With the canopy down and screen up there is great wind protection and it wasn’t long before I had to apply some sun screen to my neck. The Thailand tan being sported by the Malankans was dealing quite well with the early spring sun (more later), Charlie on the other hand was rapidly developing a snazzy line in pink noses..
We all took a turn at the helm and bimbled our way downriver towards Ludham Bridge without actually seeing many boats. One boat we did see however prompted me to put my wicked head on. Coming the other way just after the bridge (upstream) were Simon/Sonia plus Dylan and The Corsican. She looked magnificent in the sunshine, top down and both Corsicans glowing after a day in the sun. My wicked streak took over. “Move that ugly fat monstrosity out of the way” I yelled loudly, whilst gesticulating wildly and pointing toward the bank. This monstrous behaviour was made even more effective as I had positioned MD right dead centre of the river and poor Simon had nowhere to go. (Carousels are big wide boats and contrary to popular belief they don’t handle very well, especially compared to a 1950s wooden cruiser with which I am quite familiar)
Meanwhile back on The Corsican poor Simons face was a study in barely suppressed rage and the most fun part was that Dylan already knew who we were and was whining and woofling to Boris who was replying in kind, but Simon was at that point so close to apoplexy he didn’t seem to care.
To put him out of his misery I stood up and immediately he cracked a huge smile and burst out laughing. We then drew both boats side by side using lots of thrusters and high tech stuff and exchanged our greetings in the more traditional manner. Simon had forgotten to read his PM where we had told him what we were doing and on which boat. Never mind the surprise was worth it.
Kisses blown and cheery waves delivered it was time to take the behemoth through the bridge. There was plenty of height but with over 12ft 6 of fat tail MD is no slim eel of a performer like Malanka.
Horn warning sounded we emerged through the bridge and were immediately hailed by Jason and his merry band, all of whom seemed to be messing about with or very near Braveheart (again), so once again we thrusted and stopped and had a little chat. At the rate we were going we would turn up at the hotel with very little daylight left.
We had so far averaged 2.8mph down the river and we saw no reason to increase our rate of speed, and so we made very slow progress and enjoyed the scenery which was just starting to bud into green shoots of life and it all looked magnificent in contrast to the stark brown wintery twigs and branches. We traversed Horning without incident or in fact seeing many folk we knew. Gus at the New Inn of course recognised us straight away and we called across to tell him we would be returning for some water later in the week.
By now the wind was dying on its feet and the sun was setting although still very strong and full in our faces. Fiona later informed us that early April sun strength is similar to late August and so we knew we would have more than Charlie’s pink nose later. I should say at this point that the ladies of the crew seemed to find the saloon bed seat thingy an ideal place from which to sunbathe and generally chill out and chat. Later in the week we left this up permanently and used it as a huge internal cooling breeze free sun pad.
For some reason as we passed the Salhouse nature trail a ranger waved his lollipop at us to “slow down” he did indicate this was only a wee bit (finger and thumb gesture) however both Garmin and boat speedo were indicating 4.0 mph so we smiled sweetly and slowed back down to our, what became customary, 3.6mph. At either of those speeds the wake generated by MD is indistinguishable and so we laughed and carried on through the remainder of the 5mph section not really understanding what he was on about.   There was a day boat behind us doing his best to catch and pass us so maybe he decided to believe we were racing, whatever the case he is the man with the stick.
In due course the day boat passed us as we entered the 4mph section leading to Wroxham and we slowed even further to a very sedate 2.8 mph. We approached the hotel mooring and used all the toys available to slip in and tie up, it was fun playing with the toys and as we stopped the engine (which at slow speed is very quiet) we began to relax properly into our week afloat.
The plan for dinner was to have chicken from the fried chicken shop and some Chinese (for me) from the take away but before then we had a wander about, walked the dog and generally chilled out.
When dinner time arrived there was quite a wait at the take away but it was worth it as the beef chow mien and sweet and sour chicken were both superb.  The 12 chicken balls per portion was way more than I was anticipating and they lasted for days.   Whilst we were waiting for the food the dying sun had finally dipped below the bridge but not before delivering a spectacular sunset worthy of a painting. We were all very tired as the fresh air had taken its toll, we laughed at our pink noses and headed off for a deep dreamless sleep.


Life is too short

M&F

Forum Girly Swot 11.02.2011


This message was edited by fidear45 on Apr-24-14 @ 6:58 PM

riyadhcrew
Apr-25-2014 @ 6:03 AM                           Permalink
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Dear M&F,
Very nice tale and now thinking about 106 days ahead on Carousel, as that message when I log in keeps telling me. My face is still a bit sore from laughing at your story, especially the bit with the ranger and the lollipop. Looking forward to the next episode. Enjoy and stay safe.


best regards,
Eric

Charlie
Apr-25-2014 @ 1:05 PM                           Permalink
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Whilst Martin does his thing with the story telling (better than I ever could) Fiona and I will attempt to illustrate with photos.  

Charlie

8 x forum girly swot & Official Aston
Anorak


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readyabout
Apr-27-2014 @ 9:04 AM                           Permalink
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quote:"......the most fun part was that Dylan already knew who we were and was whining and woofling to Boris who was replying in kind......."

Nice touch!  Wink

Regards

Paul
________________________________________________________
'readyabout' - the first meaningful adult phrase from my childhood....

fidear45
Apr-29-2014 @ 3:59 PM                           Permalink
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OK folks here is the next day 5 going mad on Moon Discovery.
Sunday 6th April
Wroxham to Salhouse for doggy swim and then to Womack dyke – tea at the King’s Head
Sunday was going to be a bit of a lazy day as we wanted to pick up provisions at Roys, pootle about walking Boris the magnificent, go to the pet shop, and generally lark about doing not very much before ending up in Womack Dyke for the evening. We intended to stop over in Salhouse and say hello to Holly the Salhouse lady there. It is also a good opportunity for Boris the magnificent to swim and enjoy running about in the water without thousands of screaming zealots telling me he should be on a lead.  He loves a swim and it really helps with his elbow dysplasia.
Sunday dawned early aboard MD, two guys with VERY load voices were discussing putting the world to rights outside the hotel at roughly 6am. Just as I was about to enquire if they intended to wake everyone on the boat up with their loud prognostications they said farewell and disappeared. Fiona and I dozed fitfully after that and just lay there under the snuggly duvet wondering which one of us was going to go put the kettle on. We didn’t have to worry as some suppressed giggling coming from the saloon soon gave us a clue as to the origin of the first cup of the day. “Ssshh Boris, Stop it! Ow, HHmmpph” came ringing through the cabin. From the sequence of sounds and suppressed laughter we assumed (quite rightly as it turned out) that Boris had discovered that his dream of Charlie still being on the boat had come true and he was showing his gratitude by performing the now famous zig-zag snake dance all over Charlie’s supine form. We didn’t enquire what he was presenting in his mouth but from the snuffling and gruffling sounds he was making we assumed (again correctly) that is was his ball. His ball is a bit of misnomer really as any ball he finds immediately becomes his ball but you know what I mean.
Fiona and I lay there suppressing our own laughter as we heard Charlie attempting to get dressed without Boris standing on her, stealing her clothes or heaven forfend, putting his head and therefore very cold nose, where we were quite sure Charlie didn’t want it to be.
After a few minutes we gave in and announced that we were awake and as Charlie was going to take the Boris for his morning Texas walk (don’t ask) we would make the tea. This must have been some sort of “we” that I was not familiar with as the “we” very quickly turned into “are you going to put the kettle on then?” when I emerged from the very nice ensuite in the bow cabin of MD. The added “will you turn the heating on whilst you’re there” made for a few moments of stony silence as I contemplated the cold retort waiting on my tongue that was almost as cold as my feet and other diminished extremities.
Heating on, kettle on, jammies, slippers and fluffy thermal socks on, we slowly started to emerge from the hibernation state achieved overnight on a boat in early April. The good news was that there was hardly any condensation and no drips at all in complete contrast to other earlier hire boats we had used. Cold air contains a lot less moisture but hey, no drips at all! Marvellous stuff well-done Richos.
We heard the pitter-patter of clawed toes as Charlie returned with the dog, and then watched the daily ritual of wiping Boris dry which remained a source of unabashed amusement all week long. “Sit, Boris sit” says Charlie, who then proceeds to request one paw after another to be raised into the cleaning position so she can apply the doggie towel to remove grit, grime, or just excess wetness. This comical scene will be repeated many times during our holiday on board MD. It never fails to raise a smile.
On board MD we had various porcine breakfast products and so it was the full English for breakfast with lashings of hot tea.
The only issue I had with any of this was the location of the provisions. Unusually for a GRP cruiser there is no shortage of storage space on board MD, there is even a wine-rack too. So after forlornly opening cupboard after cupboard only to discover they did not contain the ketchup, salt, pepper etc. I turned to the man equivalent of the last resort and I asked the ladies. After washing up and clearing everything away from the excellently balanced and very stable dining table, which is situated in its own dining area. This is absolutely superb from a practicality point of view as the table can be moved out of the way to give play space dog lying space or just space.
Soon the day was beckoning and it was time for top down and off we go. This of course is another opportunity to use the multitude of techno toys on MD and I unashamedly made use of them all. The usual suspects in the bar and breakfast area of the hotel were there watching the whole performance. I am never quite certain if they are watching for a mistake or to genuinely watch boats manoeuvre, today it didn’t matter as the whole thing went flawlessly as we reversed away, spun on the spot (toys)and set off down the river with a cheery wave.  
The handling of MD is quite good when the toys are available but one issue we did find was that when the engine is cold the hydraulic nature of the bow and stern thrusters means that when in use the power available for the prop and whatever you are doing with that drops dramatically. The alternative is to slip her into neutral and increase the power available which stops the prop altogether. Hmm this aspect of the boat should be looked at IMO as in somewhere like Reedham for instance this could cause some issues with a fast flowing river. The Carousel is not a fast boat and in the fast flow there she would really struggle with a cold engine and pulling away from the quayside into a fast flow, especially if this was done going astern.  
We set off to Salhouse at a very slow pace and generally enjoyed the short cruise with the top down the sun out and everything fine with the world. During the journey we found some more doggy towels and prepared for what was to come. Arriving at Salhouse there was so much room we didn’t know where to stop, we would be taking on water at this stop and so we decided to moor near the longer hose and the boardwalk to the car park. Holly was there just setting up her canoes and other Salhouse goodies for the day and so we slipped in stern on with no fuss at all and immediately let Boris the magnificent out of the back door. He was sporting his harness and his new bright red bandana and of course he was carrying the ubiquitous tennis ball, but this time only the one.

Once the door was opened he hurdled the stern well and dashed towards the beach, ears flapping, his curly tail wagging and closely resembling nothing short of a 50kg black and gold whirlwind. His intended targets were of course the few geese that had not seen him coming. His technique of goose harassment has not improved since last year and for him everything is in the chase and he didn’t even attempt to grab a goose so to speak. Probably the reason for this would be that goose grabbing, although quite tasty if a trifle messy, would necessitate him dropping the ever present tennis ball nestled between his not inconsiderable jaws. So for Boris he contents himself, as always with some warning woofles scattering the flock which means he doesn’t lose too much face with the perennial failure to actually catch anything.  The geese long practiced at doggie avoidance simply waddled further out into the water, shook their tail feathers in his direction, regarded him with complete disdain and honked indignantly at the upstart dog. To the watching humans this was to be expected and we then got down to the more serious business of giving Boris an early morning swim.

We threw the ball in a few times and Boris, ran, then jumped, then swam after the ball to retrieve the blessed thing. After four or five repetitions of this and the swimming part getting longer and longer we noticed that Boris seemed to be lower in the water than we remembered from last summer’s outings. All that we could see was his head and half his ears were submerged. “It must be his fur” said Charlie, after Boris emerged from the water for the last time, which was indicated by his lying down and panting all the while retaining the ball. We did notice the enormous flow of water that was streaming off him and heading back to the broad. At that moment a small loony dog (Jack Russell) appeared and attempted to engage Boris in a “come and play with me” dance. Nope, Boris was having none of it and resolutely kept hold of his ball and ignored the little pipsqueak.

Whilst all this was going on and we were doing the “he is an Airedale Terrier and yes he is a big one speech”, a rather stern faced man with a springer spaniel on an extending lead turned the corner and looked in our direction, the look on his face and the directness of his gait spoke volumes as to what was to come. He headed toward us and tightened the lead on his obviously very excited spaniel, Boris on the other hand was completely unconcerned and he watched the approach of the two new friends with complete indifference. Just as the stern faced man was obviously intending to deliver his well- used lecture on how Boris should be on a lead and any other self-opinionated garbage he chose to deliver, Boris slumped down, hummphed his feeling of enormous contentment and closed his eyes.

We continued to speak with the owners of the Jack Russell who was busy chasing sticks in and out of the water. The stern faced man was crestfallen, the facial expression was a study in frustration, he was all set to deliver his righteous indignation on the topic of dogs and leads and Boris trumped him by ignoring his twisting and whining spaniel and simply laid-down and slept. Fiona and I smiled sweetly as the now even sterner faced man, robbed of his moment of triumph sloped off his metaphorical tail between his legs. Oh what a lovely day this was going to be.  Over the past 12 months Boris has become a very stable and steady animal with impeccable manners worthy of his German ancestry. Big dogs like him are required to pass a “good citizen test” to be allowed to live, he would pass with flying colours and we are very proud of him.

We walked Boris round to the Bluebell protected area in the company of an older lady and her two very well behaved dogs, with the aim of drying Boris off. We arrived back at the beach, talked to Holly and gave her a view round MD whilst we filled up with water, but soon it was time to depart, direction Womack. We had all day to go not very far so we decided that today we would get mini ready and have a brief sail on the way to Womack, the location chosen was South Walsham as it is close to Womack so we could stay sailing later into the afternoon, and also the broad there has some really nice crosswinds which make for interesting sailing.  With that goal in mind we hauled up the mud-weight, hauling sounds like we did it but alas no, it was the technology wot done it, and then headed to Horning. The day was simply magnificent; the sun was high in a clear blue sky and very strong and warming our faces as we made slow and steady progress to South Walsham. Arriving at the broad we did notice there was a significant breeze blowing and I briefly considered reefing the sail on Mini to help with the conditions. Instead of reefing the sail I asked if Charlie would be ballast for me. By inviting a young lady to provide ballast whilst one sails a dinghy is not widely regarded as ensuring a long and happy life in full possession of ones faculties. However the pink nosed one (the nose had now been re-energised by the trip from Wroxham) took it all in good spirit and gamely decided to come along. But only if I bailed out the water from the dinghy, dried the bottom and gave her a towel to sit on.  
OK so after bailing, drying and general faffing about I was finally ready to put up the rig which took just a few minutes and then we were ready for the off. Charlie sat in the bows and I was handling the tiller and sail. We had dropped the mud-weight into the broad roughly 80 metres or so from the small broad on the right hand side and that’s where we left MD as we shot away from the boat after engaging warp drive (letting the sail out). Mini was shooting across the water with an huge bow wave and it was all a whole lot of fun, as the breeze just seemed to get stronger and stronger the longer we stayed out. We tacked, reached and generally had a full and complete play into and with the by now very strong breeze. Charlie’s face had gone a fairly pasty white colour as mini zipped hither and thither across the water, the temperature was not great in the wind and the pasty white complexion was contrasted by the Rudolph-esque nose and the Pippy Longstocking like rosy cheeks caused by the still freshening breeze. We collectively decided to have one more circuit of the broad and then head back and off to Womack. After the most exciting circuit so far we called it a day and headed back to take the sail down and get ready to depart. As we arrived at the back of MD we noticed that she was not exactly where we had left her an hour beforehand. We could easily discern this to be the case by the simple expedient of looking at the proximity to the trees when they had been a good 50 metres away when we moored up, now it was more like 5. We quickly made everything fast on mini, boarded MD and started the engine. The two occupants of MD had been enjoying the sun and some snacks and hadn’t noticed the drag on the mud-weight. Potential embarrassment avoided, Fiona brought round the drinks and snacks which we nibbled on as we bimbled up the dyke and out towards Womack.

Turning up the Thurn mouth, the wind was still increasing and we passed comments back and forth about Malanka’s  storm tossed adventure back in October last year. Turning into the entrance to the river to Ludham the difference between the protected dyke and the open river could not have been starker.  The dyke was a haven of peace and tranquillity after the ravening beast of the windy river, we had our pick of the most attractive and convenient mooring spots and chose one 60 metres back from the turn by Hunters yard. During the tying up process Charlie noticed we needed to drop a fender or two as the water was very high, and this she did whilst Fiona and I messed about inside getting the tea on. After a lovely brew and a typical broads holiday moment as the sun was slowly setting we decided to walk Boris into the village to allow us to book a table at the Kings Head for later, and also to tire him out so he didn’t mind when we left him to go for dinner. We walked into the village and duly booked a table for 19:30, as we did so we couldn’t help but notice how popular the pub was for the Carvery on a Sunday afternoon.

We sauntered back to the boat enjoying the warm spring evening and then showered, washed, primped and generally made ourselves respectable before heading back to the village a couple of hours later for a very enjoyable dinner at the pub.  The food was excellent and Charlie enjoyed her first experience of the Kings Head. We had brought our very large torch to use on the way back to the dyke in the dark, and we all enjoyed a banter fuelled walk back to the boat. Before we left we had turned on the lovely blue mood lights which were now showing us where to step to avoid falling in the river. One of us would fall in this trip but it wasn’t me.   Boris was let out for one more Airedale run up and down the dyke with all of his people in close attendance before it was time for bed and sleepy anticipation of a new day tomorrow.


Life is too short

M&F

Forum Girly Swot 11.02.2011

fidear45
Apr-29-2014 @ 8:14 PM                           Permalink
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Life is too short

M&F

Forum Girly Swot 11.02.2011


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